Requisit Respite

Sunday, March 16, 2008


I was saying my prayers the other night and I was thinking of all the things I have to be thankful for. I've been so gloomy lately. I feel like I have nothing to look forward to and I'm doing nothing worthwhile with my life except working at a job just to make money.
I hope my kids learn that if they pick a job that they like they will never 'work' a day in their lives.
I long for my job at the newspaper again. I loved that job.
But anyway... getting back to being thankful...(ahem*)
I'm thankful I live in a free country. I'm reading a book written by a Czech saint who found the gospel during Communist rule. It brought back all the feelings I had when I was first investigating the church. I borrowed the book or I would be highlighting it. This author says so many wonderful things and in a new way.
I'm thankful for my house; that I have shelter from the elements. When we first moved here I was walking up the yard on the side of the house and I heard a voice say to me, "This house is a gift." I got the impression it was temporary and I was to enjoy it as long as possible. Since that 'revelation' I have never taken this house for granted. It's been 18 years now.
I'm thankful for my intelligence. That might sound conceited. I don't mean that I'm really intelligent. I mean, I love to grasp new ideas and learn new things all the time. I work in an environment where peoples' mental lives are over. I wonder why they are still living. I wonder why God lets them live such unproductive lives. One day as I was questioning this, I was told that there are so many compassionate people around that need these jobs that we have to give them to look after these old people. I suppose I should not question it anymore. God lets them live because the doctors and nurses help them to live because their children/spouses want them to live. I pray when I get old and am no longer any use to anyone that my children will just let me quietly pass from the earth. I don't want to go into any nursing home. Just bring someone in to change my diapers. Don't feed me if I don't want to eat anymore, and keep the morphine nearby if I'm in pain of any sort. I hope to go out with my mind in tact. Please, God?
I'm so thankful for the gospel knowledge that I have. I know I was chosen to receive this gift of the true gospel of Jesus Christ. I don't know if it was my ancestors pushing me toward it, or some mission I accepted in the pre-existence to bring my family to the gospel. Whatever it was, I am so grateful to the missionaries who followed the prompting to knock on my door and to persist in trying to contact me.
I'm thankful for my friends. I don't think I would be half of who I am without them. I have so many friends, they are too numerous to mention. I think I am still here because of my friends and their care for me.
I am so thankful for my kids and I love them so much. They complete me as a person. I am so lonely without them. Granted, I sometimes want some peace and quiet, but that's what a vacation is for. I hope some day all of us can live near each other. I'd love if all the grandkids could be loving cousins together. It would be so good to have them close by. But who knows what the future will bring. They might all live so far from each other that they might as well be scattered throughout the four quarters of the earth.
I pray I can live near my kids and that they all live near each other. That is a hefty prayer when people scatter all over to live now.

New Day

Well...the musical is over for another year. It brings back a lot of high school memories. Meistersingers and musicals were the best part of high school for me. I was hoping my kids could get a taste of it. Three of them did. It doesn't appear Timmy wants anything to do with it. According to him, he can't sing and he can't act. He likes band, so that's his performance. I still wish he could have the musical experience. It's like no other.